• "Excuse me, are you a virgin?"
    No
    "Then can I have the box that it came in?"


  • "Hey baby, can I tickle your bellybutton?"
    ----------------------------
    "From the inside..."


  • "Hey pretty thing, are you looking for a job?"
    No
    "Well I'd like to have you on my staff anyway!"


  • "Just call me milk cuz I do the body good."


  • "Hey baby, wanna fuck?"
    No!
    "Don't be picky, I wasn't."


  • "Baby, you are looking phat!"
    What?
    "P-H-A-T: Pretty hott and tempting!"


  • "If I jumped on your back, would you beat me off?"


  • "I'm gonna have sex with you tonight so you might as well be there."


  • "Is there a rainbow outside your house?"
    No, why?
    "because you're the treasure I've been lookin for."


  • "Is your name Gillette?"
    No, why?
    "Cause you're the best a man can get."


  • "Hey baby, 69 means dinner for 2."


  • "Do you work for UPS?"
    No, why?
    "Because I saw you checking out my package."


    "If you were a tear in my eye, I would never cry for fear of losing you."

  • "Can we play house?"
    "You be the door and I'll slam you!"


  • "Come here and sit on my lap and we'll get something straight between us."


  • "If I wrote the alphabet, I would put U and I together."


  • "What could be so wrong in heaven that an angel like you is here on earth?"


  • "Your body's name must be visa because it's everywhere I want to be."


  • "I heard milk does the body good, but DAMN girl, how much milk you been drinking?"


  • "Why don't you come over and sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up."


  • "I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked"


  • "How are you?"
    Fine, how are you?
    "Would you like to find out?"


  • "I seemed to have lost my virginity, can I have yours?"


  • "I forgot my phone number, can I have yours?"


  • "Quick, I need a quarter! My mother asked me to call her when I fell in love!"


  • "The word of the day is Legs ..."
    "So lets go back to my place and spread the word!"


  • "I wish you were a love buffet."
    Why?
    "So I could lay you on the table and take my pick."


  • "Is your name Candy?"
    No, why?
    "Because you are looking so sweet."


  • "If beauty stank, you'd be the shit!"



  • "Hey do you like fruit?"
    Yes, why?
    "Well suck this, it's a peach."


  • "Do you want to play elevator?"
    What's that?
    "It's up right now, wanna go down on it?"


  • "Is your daddy a thief?"
    Why?
    "Because he stole the stars out of the sky and put them in your eyes."


  • "Damm, there must be something wrong with my eyes!"
    Why
    "Because they've been stuck on you all day!"


  • "Do you know why girls masturbate with this finger?"
    (Hold out index finger)
    "Because it's mine!"


  • "Would you like to play Pearl Harbor?"
    "I'll be America, you be Japan and blow the hell out of me!"


  • "Would you sleep with me?"
    No
    "Have another beer."


  • Do you have the time?
    "Why? Do you have the energy?"


  • You seem shy.
    "The only thing I'm shy of is two inches from a foot."


  • "Fuck me if I'm wrong, but I know you want to kiss me."


  • "I love every bone in your body, especially mine."


  • "Is your daddy a baker?"
    Why?
    "Becuase you got some nice buns."


  • "Just call me Toyota."
    Why?
    "Because I love what you do for me!"


  • "Are those space pants you're wearing?"
    Why?
    "Cause your ass is outta this world."


  • "Hey baby you know what looks good on you?"
    No
    "Me!"


  • "Wanna go get a pizza and fuck?"
    No
    "I'm sorry, you don't like pizza?"


  • "I lost my teddy bear, would you sleep with me?"


  • "Sit on my face and i will eat my way to your heart."


  • "Would you like to dance?"
    No
    "I guess you didn't hear me right, I said your ass looks mighty fat in those pants!"


  • "If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"


  • "If you and I were squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?"


  • "Excuse me, do you believe in pre-marital sex?"
    No
    "Well I'm married so lets fuck!"


  • "Baby, if you were a buger, I'de pick you first."


  • "Excuse me, could you give me directions?"
    To where?
    "Your heart."


  • "Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Gretchen?"


  • I've got the ship, you've got the harbor, what do you say we tie up for the night?"


  • "That dress looks good on you, but it would look even better in a crumpled up little ball on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning."


  • "That dress is very becoming on you, if i was on you I'd be cumming too."


  • "I have the F the C and the K and now all I need is you."


  • "If God made anything better looking than you he must have kept it for himself."


  • "Let's do some math! Add you and me together, subtract our clothes, divide your legs and multiply!"


  • "Is yer dad a terrorist?"
    Why?
    "Cuz you da' bomb!"


  • "Is yer name Cambells?"
    Why?
    "Cuz you are mmm mmm good!"


  • "Do you sleep on your stomach?"
    Why?
    "Can I?"


  • "Did it hurt?"
    What?
    "Fallin from heaven."


  • "Can I get a picture of you?"
    Why?
    "So I can show santa what I want for Christmas."


  • "Are your feet hurting?"
    Why?
    "You been runnin through my mind all day."


  • "Was that love at first sight or should I walk by again?"


  • "Damm I need a broom!"
    Why?
    "Because I'm about to sweep you off your feet."


  • "Do you wash yer pants with windex?"
    Why?
    "Because I can see myself in 'em."
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